New mom's lie

Once you have a newborn your automatically signed up for a baby competition. Imagine meeting a group of friends for a morning jog then you arrive to find out it's really a race. "I didn't sign up for this." You haven't trained, your not wearing race shoes, and you don't know the course. This is how I feel talking to new mom's. There is a need to out run each other. They tell you to call them for advice or just to vent anytime. But, when you do they end up sharing how great their baby is and how wonderful life is. Once you share your troubles they sigh and say "It gets better and time goes by so fast." Their tone is annoying, making you feel so beneath them. Suddenly, their 7 month old is so much older then your 3 month old..they can't even remember that far back. Really?

You tell them your not able to nurse anymore and you might as well have bad body odor then run on the other side of the street. Breastfeeding moms have a need to show off plain and simple. Even if it started out difficult, became easy and now they can feed with their eyes closed. I lasted 3 months and they're trying to last a year. Sorry, but having a 1 year old sit on my lap to nurse while she's trying to watch "Yo Gabba Gabba" at the same time was never my goal. The best question so far, "have you considered buying breast milk?" Are you serious? "Would that be down the baby aisle and can I use my Ralph's club card?" What works for some may not work for others...NEWS FLASH

Trying to set a schedule, figure out a routine or just let the baby guide can make you crazy. I let them know my little lady has a hard time sleeping and they tell me their kid sleeps 7 to 7. Really? How does this help me? I ask about diapers and their precious is almost potty trained. Really? I'm looking for simple baby toys to keep her entertained. Don't bother, their child only likes adult objects (remote controls or a phone) and can't have anything from China. I ask for bathing advice because my baby cries but they can't help. Mommy and baby take a bath together everyday and have since birth. Really? I did try this, my baby girl spit up on me twice and screamed the entire time. I tell them my baby has colic, meaning she's super fussy all the time. They have to look the definition up. Their little one only cries when hungry, tired, or wet. Really?

Maybe I should make up a perfect baby.

She sleeps from 7 to 7 and won't make a sound when she wakes up. Just lies there with eyes open waiting for me.

When she needs a new diaper she kicks her right leg up twice. (started at birth)

During feedings, she holds her hand in front of her mouth in case she spits up. (wouldn't want to dirty mom)

She blinks her eyes 3 times to let you know she's tired. (please place in crib)

Oh, she Loves bath time....can't get enough. Smiles and coos the whole time

Won't touch plastic toys has to be wooden only

Yes, new mom's lie. Baby life is tough and there is no easy way around it. If it was so easy there wouldn't be a need for all the baby books. Perhaps the new mom's I know are just bitter because I had a dream delivery. Four hours start to finish without any pain medication, no horror story here. While mom's get over it, baby life is kicking my butt so your winning this race....for now.

*I'am very blessed to have such great friends who offer me advice and they are very fortunate to have enjoyable baby time...I hope to be there soon:)