1st Mother's Day

Wow, I still can't believe I'm a mother. I have really been thinking about this day a lot over the last week. A few times while I'm holding O I just start crying for no reason at all. Just a flow of emotions, I guess. There is so much I want to say to her and thought I should write her a note.

Dear my sweet Lady O,

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine,

You make me happy when skies are GREY

You'll never know dear how much I love you, so I will tell you everyday.

Years ago I never knew If I wanted to be a mother. Once I began to think about wanting a baby I never knew when it would happen or if I would know how to be one. Then your daddy and I found out we were going to be blessed with a baby...and it would be a girl. What joy! I was so excited but scared at the same time. I had been told everything will fall into place and the mothering instincts will kick in. I hoped so.

The day you were born was amazing, the doctor placed you in my arms, and my first thought was thank you Jesus. She is perfect. You are now close to 6 months old and the last few months have been far from easy. Recently things have started to change and you are now showing all the wonderful "normal" baby behaviors. Either you are becoming an easy baby or we are getting stronger.

I was looking into your eyes yesterday and I could hear you talking to me while I started to cry. You said..."mom why do you look sad? I am getting better everyday and look how happy I'am. You and daddy make me smile so much and I don't feel anymore pain. Jesus choose you to be my mother and gave me this special birthmark on my face because he knew you could handle it with his grace. Lets make a promise mom to be joyful everyday..I love you mommy".

"Oh my little O you've taught me so much already you don't even know".

Love you mom

Yes, as a mother you want everyone to see your baby as you do, beautiful and have a problem free life. I have heard small children look at O and then turn to a parent and ask, "mommy why does she have that on her face"? Your heart breaks and in the moment you can't respond. However, next time I will say that is her special beauty mark Jesus gave her and it makes her really strong. I hope Lady O knows how special, loved and beautiful she is...perfect in every way just as she was created to be. Happy Mother's day.