Just a thought...2

So, I finally took my little lady to her first music class. I thought it would be a perfect way to see other babies her age and hear some nursery songs. (She sure won't hear them from me). Like most days, everything interferes with precious nap time, so I had to wake her for class. (Perhaps a sign of the future). I placed a new black & white dress on her, brushed a few strands of hair, placed the ballet slipper socks on her feet and off we went. I thought the class started at 12:15 but we arrived fashionably late at 12:20. However, when we walked in I realized the class started at 12. I felt horrible about being late, I'm a terrible mother, it was her first class EVER. I'm late for pretty much everything in my life and if I arrive 5 mins after I often consider that early.

Of course she has no idea where we are or what we're going to do. But as I looked around at our peers I noticed my baby is the oldest one of the group. (And the cutest, babies really leave the house in their sleep-n-plays)? I thought this class would have more 6 month olds, most kids were under 4 months. The biggest event was trying to get the babies to follow a paper towel roll with their eyes. "Umm hello, that is so 3 months ago". I knew my lady was bored when she found shoving her fist in her mouth more exciting. Oh well I tried. Before we walked out the door I asked the leader if we should be in an older class but she said, "well she's not sitting straight up on her own yet, so you should stay her". Is my baby already being held back before kindergarten? Why are more 6 month olds not in this class? We have a medical excuse you know. As a new mom you can't help but compare baby developments, it's our jo. In fact the only question I ever ask is, "how old is he/she"? I could care less what the child's name is, Jack, Emily, Sarah with an H, whatever..I just need age.

Happy to report my little one loved the big puppet Gymbo and that made the class worth it. We will return in cute outfits and hopefully with babies our own age.

Flight time

When your in-laws live in another state, you can bet traveling is only a matter of time. Well, our time arrived. We had to fly to the East coast, this means 5 hours up in the air with a 6 month old. Like everything else related to babies, I know nothing. However, I've heard you should give your baby Benadryl to knock them out. It's like the secret drug the doctors don't want to advertise for flying. Your child will either fall asleep, or stay wide awake.

We decided to test out this special medication the day before our flight. So glad we did. We gave our daughter half the dose recommended by the pediatrician, and that was enough. Our poor little lady was on Crack. (Not that we know anything about Crack). She could not fall asleep all day. Every time we tried for a nap, she was up within a few minutes. When bedtime finally arrived, we figured she must be exhausted, no luck. She laid in her crib staring at the walls with a frightened look across her face. When we tried to approach her, she let out a tiny cry as if we were just big scary faces coming for her. Poor little lady.

We now know Crack and Benadryl are not for her. (Good to know). Like most things in mommy world, I build things up in my mind to be worse than they turn out to be. This is my way of preparing for the worse, and begin praying for the best. She was GREAT, praise God. Our sweet little girl did not fuss at all. She took her bottle during take off, and landing, just like we rehearsed on the way to the airport. She slept in her car seat almost the entire flight without any assistance. Love her.

My favorite part was the woman in the row ahead of us, on our flight home. The second she saw my husband place the baby into the seat, she let out a huge sigh of disappointment. I then overheard her tell another woman, "wouldn't you know it, we're surrounded by kids". The sad truth is, I'm guilty of saying those words in my BB life. However, the AB woman I am today wanted to stick my tongue out and say "oh well". But I didn't have to say anything our little angel showed her.

Making it through another baby first is a great feeling. Every time we make it through a new experience, our confidence grows a teeny tiny bit. (Let's not become too confident, baby steps).

Our time in the air was really good we can only hope for more of the same on future flights. I also hope not to have another bratty 3 year old sitting behind us. (I did stick my tongue out at her, sorry).

Six months and counting

Happy to say we made it to 6 months. Most of our hair is still on our heads, but there's definitely a little grey now coming through. I had no expectations for this half year marker. For us 3 months was suppose to be the magic number, that got moved to 4 months, now 6. Once the colic and constant crying went away, I was content with whatever. A wonderful blessing is the fact that her ulceration on the lip has healed and she now has full range of her arms. Her chubby chipmunk steroid cheeks have reduced and she is holding her own at a sweet 16 pounds. My bicep curls are usually done with only 15 pound weights, guess I need to start pushing myself for more. I read somewhere that every household should have a 6 month old because it's such a fun time. "Really"?

Now, I'm not complaining but if you think about it trying to entertain a baby is sort of like talking to yourself and thinking your funny. I'm glad my baby pretends to pay attention and when she laughs, I like to think it's with me, and not at me. I can't sing to save my life, or anyone else's. I finally found a website with words to nursery rhymes but can't figure out what the tunes are. The only song I can confidently hum is the Jeopardy theme song. However, I can make up some pretty crazy lyrics for all activities, "the best time is bath time", "it's changing diaper time", "feed me please", and a crowd favorite "I'm cute so I toot". My days are REAL busy doing what, I have no idea? I just hope each wake time is enjoyable, goes by fast, then its nap time again and I can gear up for my next performance. The days of waking up slowly and hitting the snooze button five times are long gone. The boss lady, in the lavender room, tells us when its time to get out of bed, but she needs me to take her out of the crib..so take that little lady.

Trying to keep a 6 month old entertained takes up alot of time. I wonder how long till she becomes bored of staring at the ceiling fans. That is always a good time filler. Times are changing, there is no longer time for reading all my wonderful fiction books I'm too busy living in the non fiction.

Eating out again

Well it finally happened, we ate in a restaurant, all three of us. On a beautiful Sunday afternoon we headed out into the public just to stroll around town. We are always thinking about what we can eat while out, but unfortunately, Subway and McDonald's are the usual choices. This day however, my husband suggested we try a restaurant. The words, "serious, really, and are you kidding", came to mind. But it was a Mexican restaurant and they serve margaritas so count me in.

I walked up to the host stand and added our name to the wait list. The manager asked, "how many"? A simple question, but how do I answer? Technically, we are still two but now there is a little person attached to us. Does she count as one? I responded, "two please". My husband added, "and a stroller". The Manager informed us, "that it will be a bit longer". Perfect, now we are being punished for pushing a stroller around.

As we sat waiting, buzzer in hand, I wished 'O' could understand the 'evil eye' stare that only a mother can give. The one that says "be on your best behavior". After 20 minutes the manager sat us in the center of the room with plenty of room for our Bob stroller. I have to admit, I was afraid of having my baby cry, causing people to look at us. I know those people well, I use to be one of them. Once the server approached, we were ready with our drink orders. Knowing I was once again going to enjoy a margarita, along with chips and salsa, made the wait worth it. We made it out of our lunch without any injuries, minimal crying and no ugly looks. That was our first step into being a party of three..please.

1st Mother's Day

Wow, I still can't believe I'm a mother. I have really been thinking about this day a lot over the last week. A few times while I'm holding O I just start crying for no reason at all. Just a flow of emotions, I guess. There is so much I want to say to her and thought I should write her a note.

Dear my sweet Lady O,

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine,

You make me happy when skies are GREY

You'll never know dear how much I love you, so I will tell you everyday.

Years ago I never knew If I wanted to be a mother. Once I began to think about wanting a baby I never knew when it would happen or if I would know how to be one. Then your daddy and I found out we were going to be blessed with a baby...and it would be a girl. What joy! I was so excited but scared at the same time. I had been told everything will fall into place and the mothering instincts will kick in. I hoped so.

The day you were born was amazing, the doctor placed you in my arms, and my first thought was thank you Jesus. She is perfect. You are now close to 6 months old and the last few months have been far from easy. Recently things have started to change and you are now showing all the wonderful "normal" baby behaviors. Either you are becoming an easy baby or we are getting stronger.

I was looking into your eyes yesterday and I could hear you talking to me while I started to cry. You said..."mom why do you look sad? I am getting better everyday and look how happy I'am. You and daddy make me smile so much and I don't feel anymore pain. Jesus choose you to be my mother and gave me this special birthmark on my face because he knew you could handle it with his grace. Lets make a promise mom to be joyful everyday..I love you mommy".

"Oh my little O you've taught me so much already you don't even know".

Love you mom

Yes, as a mother you want everyone to see your baby as you do, beautiful and have a problem free life. I have heard small children look at O and then turn to a parent and ask, "mommy why does she have that on her face"? Your heart breaks and in the moment you can't respond. However, next time I will say that is her special beauty mark Jesus gave her and it makes her really strong. I hope Lady O knows how special, loved and beautiful she is...perfect in every way just as she was created to be. Happy Mother's day.

Facing my fear

I did it! I finally faced my fear of public outings with baby. Yes, I lived to tell about it. Not only did I head out into the big scary world once this week but I went twice. The first experience was a bit frightening. As I placed O into the car and drove away I told my husband "we may just make it around the block, see you in 5 mins". But, that didn't happen. We made it to our first baby outing to meet my sweet friend and her two twin lovelies. The five us strolled around Balboa park and stopped a couple of times for feedings. Not us, them. Maybe once I get better at reading O's signs I will stop mistaking sleepy signals for food. No one wants food shoved into their mouth when all they want to do is sleep. Or do they? Anyways, the park trip was successful and we look forward to many more.

The second outing was to MOM's park, aka the mall. This was the real test. We would find out if O and I could be real life long friends. I mean if we can't shop together what will we do. I don't cook, don't have a lot of girlfriends, don't have a single creative bone in my body, and don't care to spend too much time in the sun. She was great and would start to make noise when it was time to move on. I did learn how to not waste anytime in a store. The rule is "yes or no and go". If only the sales people would get a clue, see a mom with stroller move things along. No time to be chatty Cathy and no one wants to sign up for credit cards. We both left the mall with a little something. (She doesn't know it yet). The great thing about strollers is they hold your bags. Finally, I don't have to carry anything. Now, on the next trip to MOM's park I will let her teach me how to window shop.

Fever time

We almost made it one week without rushing to the emergency room. Almost. Monday night O woke up at 11:30, by the time, I picked her up from the crib she started spitting up. Once, I had her sitting on my lap the projectile vomiting started. She was burning up. Good thing I'm not afraid of taking the wonderful rectal temp. 103! I've always known that babies can get sick but what in the world am I suppose to do with a high fever? We did our best not to panic as O continued to vomit up nothing.

While holding O, I tried to scan through the Baby 411 book and google baby with high fever. My husband called the after hours peds office to get the same answer. Finally, we decided to follow our parental instincts..off to the ER we went. We signed in at 12:30am, triage took her temp twice, she continued to vomit a bit more, and finally the doctor walked in the room at 4am. Really? Wow, glad it was an emergency. After a few hours of trying to find a diagnosis they decided she needed to be admitted to the hospital. "Here we go again".

Because O takes a beta blocker and a steroid for her hemangioma missing a dose is never good. If she can't keep food down then the medication won't stay down either. The nurses spent a good hour trying to insert an IV into her small body. Watching your little one cry from being poked by needles and a thin catheter put up her nose to clear out the mucus....not nice. As I rub her head and plant kisses on her forehead all I can do is look forward to seeing her smile again.

The hospital stay lasted for one night in our own private room..definitely a plus. Having a baby roommate on a different feeding schedule along with nurses and doctors walking in an out all day, means no rest. At least this time we could sleep or try to. I made it through the night with Lady O. First thing in the morning I saw it, there it was staring at me, the big brown eyes and the sweetest grin spread across her face. Life is good. Once the vitals were back to normal, feedings and medication were given, we were good to head home that afternoon.